


i'd do anything for love

by Jenfly



Series: when you're by my side [2]
Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Drunken Confessions, Feelings, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-11-07
Packaged: 2021-01-24 18:47:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21342967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jenfly/pseuds/Jenfly
Summary: ”You know I love you, Fred?””Yeah, I know, Rog.”
Relationships: Freddie Mercury/Roger Taylor, John Deacon/Brian May
Series: when you're by my side [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1536958
Comments: 10
Kudos: 36
Collections: Froger!Week 2019





	i'd do anything for love

**Author's Note:**

> **Prompt:** Drunken confessions
> 
> My second contribution for Froger week. And yeah, this got a bit out of hand... Ended up quite long. :D The title is taken from Meat Loaf's song _I'd Do Anything For Love._
> 
> Enjoy!

Roger was balancing two drinks in his hands as he made his way to the table where the boys sat. His movements were a bit swaying due to his drunken state but he managed not to spill the drinks even though he bumped into other people. As soon as he joined the boys, he set the drinks down on the table, pushing the other towards Freddie while draping his arm around the singer’s shoulders and sitting next to him. Their eyes met and though Roger had a bit of a hard time focusing his gaze, he could see the brown orbs shining of joy.

”Thank you darling,” Freddie said, slurring only a bit and Roger flashed a huge smile at him. Then they both took their drinks in their hands and Roger’s gaze settled on John and Brian who were sitting opposite of him and Freddie. Roger took a good sip of his drink, gaze following how John leaned closer to Brian as he listened Brian speaking to him, a soft smile on his lips. Roger smiled in between the sips but when Brian cupped John face with his other hand and drew him in a kiss, he made a face and turned to Freddie.

Freddie was looking at Brian and John, too, and Roger had to nudge him gently to get his attention.

”Let’s go and leave those lovebirds to enjoy each other.” Roger grinned, sliding his arm away from Freddie’s shoulder and grabbing his hand. Freddie just nodded, drink in his hand, and Roger didn’t waste time as he stood up and dragged Freddie with him.

The rest of the night they spent drinking, talking, laughing and dancing and by the time they got home, they were quite drunk but they could keep themselves up. With a bit of stumbling they found their way to the doors of their rooms and just as Freddie was about to disappear into his room, Roger’s words stopped him.

”You know I love you, Fred?” 

Freddie turned around to face Roger, leaning against the doorway to keep his balance and his hazy gaze met Roger’s for a moment. Something changed in his expression but Roger’s drunken mind couldn’t get a grasp of it and he just smiled at the other man.

”Yeah, I know, Rog.” 

Roger blinked, confused as his brain slowly registered the words. Even in that level of drunkenness he could understand that Freddie’s response had been a bit odd. His brows furrowed and there was a tiny sting in his heart as he watched Freddie to turn and go into his room, the door closing after him with a quiet thud.

*

The hungover wasn’t as bad as Roger thought it would be but he still felt like a crap when he woke up, head pounding and waves of nausea flipping inside him. With a groan he dragged himself up from the bed and went to bathroom to make himself at least somewhat presentable. After taking a quick shower, brushing his teeth and putting on some clean clothes, he checked himself from the mirror. He looked extremely tired, bags already clear under his eyes and with a deep sigh he turned away, exiting the bathroom. The tiny feeling of nausea was still present but he was glad he didn’t feel like he could throw up. He shuffled into the kitchen and put the kettle on before starting to make himself a sandwich.

When the tea and sandwich were ready he sit sat at the able, starting to eat in complete silence. He took the last bite of the sandwich just as he head footsteps approaching and a moment later, Freddie came to his line of vision.

”Good morning, darling,” Freddie said, flashing Roger a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. 

”I wouldn’t say this a very good but anyway,” Roger stated, gaze following as Freddie went to take a mug from cupboard and then pouring tea into it. ”How are you feeling?”

Freddie sat opposite of him and sighed. 

”I’ve felt better,” he answered, carefully sipping his tea. Something churned inside Roger as he took in Freddie’s appearance, his brows furrowing from worry. He looked like he had barely slept and his eyes seemed to be slightly red-rimmed and swollen as if he had been crying. Something wasn’t right, Roger was sure of it.

”How much do you remember from last night?”

He earned a glare from Freddie and he raised his brow, confused.

”Almost everything.”

”Almost?”

”If you’re asking if I remember you saying that you love me, then yes, I do remember that,” Freddie clarified, sounding a bit angry and Roger was a taken a back bit. Usually Freddie wasn’t this grumpy after a night spent drinking and partying. 

”Uhm, yeah, I said that because it’s true,” Roger said, mentally kicking himself as he remembered the moment from last night. He knew he had no much filter when he was drunk and he could literally pour his heart out – luckily, in this case he had only said _I love you_ instead of _I’m in love with you._ If he had said the latter one… Well, Roger didn’t even want to think about what kind of a mess it could have caused. Dealing with having feelings for his best friend was hard and even though Roger had been close to let those faithful words slip in a few occasions, he had always managed to stick with _I love you._

However, now it seemed that even those three words were somehow a bad thing.

”I’ve said that many times before and while I’ve been sober, so I’m not sure what’s the problem.”

Roger kept eyeing Freddie confused. The singer took another sip of his tea before slamming the mug onto the table so hard the tea spilled over. The look in his eyes changed slightly pained and Roger’s worry only deepened. Then Freddie just stood up, shaking his head.

”You’re the problem. You just don’t get it,” Freddie snapped and Roger’s eyes widened in shock.

A moment later the wave of anger flooded in.

”Well, maybe I would get it if I had a clue what the hell is this all about?” Roger shot back, raising his voice. Freddie just snorted, blinking rapidly as if to hold back tears.

”Just forget it. I can’t deal with this right now,” he said and turned on his heels, marching away from the kitchen and leaving Roger to stare after him dumbfounded.

* * *

A week later Roger was preparing to spend the night alone as John and Brian were on a date and more likely to spend a night somewhere else and Freddie had disappeared quite early without saying a word to him. The things between him and Freddie had been tense for the whole week and they barely talked anything else than music related things. Brian and John had noticed it and asked about what was going on but Roger had just shrugged and said that he didn’t know and that he would try to find it out.

Roger went to get a drink from the fridge and returned then to living room, sitting down on the couch and lifting his legs on the table. The snacks were ready on the bowl beside him on the couch, the TV was on and the movie he had planned to watch would start soon. He shifted slightly, taking a sip of his drink and letting out a deep sigh, closing his eyes for moment. The only sounds were coming from the TV and rain outside and it felt calming to hear their sounds mixing.

Over an hour later he was well into the movie, stuffing the snacks into his mouth while trying so hard not to laugh and spit them out when something stupid happened in the movie. The rain outside was now causing even more noise and Roger could hear the thunder roaring somewhere afar and he really hoped the storm wouldn’t get that bad that the electricity would be cut.

Soon a loud knock to the door interrupted his movie moment and with an annoyed sigh, he stood up and went to open the door. The sight that greeted him was miserable. Freddie was standing there completely soaking wet, looking so sad and defeated and Roger’s heart squeezed uncomfortably in his chest.

”I forgot my keys,” he sniffed, wobbling inside and Roger grabbed a hold of his arm, not caring about the cold wetness of Freddie’s coat. 

”Uh, are you okay?” Roger asked and Freddie flashed him a fake smile, his eyes not completely focusing on Roger.

”Guys are jerks,” Freddie huffed, leaning closer to Roger who could smell the alcohol from his breath. So, he had been drinking, then. Roger shook his head with a sigh, moving his hand to the zipper of Freddie’s coat and opened it.

”What happened?” he asked, slipping away the coat from Freddie and revealing the wet clothes that stuck to Freddie’s skin. Freddie didn’t say anything, just lowered his gaze, taking a swaying step back and Roger furrowed his brows.

”Okay, first we need to get you out of those clothes and into dry ones. Then I’m going to make some tea and you can tell me what happened. How does that sound?”

”Good,” Freddie said quietly, lifting up his gaze and giving Roger a small smile – a genuine one this time. Roger smiled at him back, sneaking his arm around Freddie’s waist and leading him then to his room to change the clothes.

*

Freddie’s face was buried into Roger’s neck and Roger’s arms were wrapped around him, his other hand slowly stroking Freddie’s back, trying to soothe the crying man. He hadn’t gotten very detailed explanation from Freddie but apparently some guy had tried to get into his pants even though he hadn’t been in the mood and the guy had then called Freddie a slut and said that no one would ever love him other than for his body.

Roger could feel the anger towards the guy storming within him. Freddie was so much more than his body. And Roger loved him – so much that it hurt sometimes. If he was honest with himself, he didn’t even know when the love he felt had crossed the line of friendship. It had happened slowly, by stealth, making his heart ache for something he was sure he could never have.

He could settle for a friendship. He could be happy. 

As long as Freddie would be by his side.

A soft mumble cut Roger’s train of thought and he couldn’t help the fond smile from rising to his lips.

”Sorry, I didn’t catch that,” he spoke quietly.

”I’m tired,” Freddie said, this time a bit louder.

Roger hummed and let his arms slip away from around Freddie. Their gazes met – Freddie’s eyes were red from crying but he did look happier now, the familiar sparkles glowing faintly in his dark eyes. The slight smile crossed his lips and Roger’s heart leapt in his chest, a warm veil wrapping around it. Then he took a hold of cover and tucked at it and Freddie got the hint, moving so that he could go under the cover.

”Thank you.” 

Roger nodded, reaching out to brush his finger’s along Freddie’s cheek, and stood then up, ready to leave and let Freddie to have some rest. He had just turned when Freddie took a hold of his wrist.

”Wait...” Freddie’s voice was quiet, even slightly hesitant. ”Can you stay?”

”Of course,” Roger answered with a smile and Freddie let go of his wrist, moving to the other side on the bed, lifting up the cover and patting the space beside him. Roger settled on the bed and Freddie smiled shyly at him before turning his back to Roger. For a moment Roger was confused but moved then closer to Freddie and threw his arm around him and Freddie let out a content sigh. It made Roger relax and he nuzzled Freddie’s neck, breathing in his scent. 

The warm veil around Roger’s heart tightened and his eyes fluttered closed.

Silence filled the room and after a while Roger thought that Freddie had already fallen asleep but then he spoke, quietly.

”I love you.”

Something uncomfortable settled into Roger’s heart as he heard the words. Tears formed in his eyes and he had to bite his bottom lip to try not to let them fall free.

It hurt to know that Freddie didn’t mean those words like Roger wanted.

He stayed silent, pretending to be asleep.

* * *

Over the next weeks things between Roger and Freddie got better but there was still some tension in the air and Brian and John pointed that out quite often. They had partied a bit less but Roger had still almost succeeded to make a big mistake by kissing Freddie while he was drunk. Luckily, some people had bumped into him and he had lost his balance before anything had happened. Roger had mentally thanked those people many times for saving his ass – after all he didn’t want to ruin anything between him and Freddie.

There had been a few drunken I love you’s spoken and every time the look in Freddie’s eyes had made Roger’s heart clench and something churn in his stomach. The smile he had offered Freddie after had always been smitten, he knew it, and countless times he had wondered how Freddie just couldn’t see it – see how desperately in love with him Roger was.

A frustrated groan filled the air and Roger was pulled back from his thoughts. He was sitting behind his drumkit, twirling the drumsticks in his hands and his attention locked on Brian who was shaking his head and setting Red Special on the stand. When he turned back, he glared at him and Freddie.

”Okay, I’ve had enough of this. You two --” he started, pointing Roger and Freddie, ”-- need to pull your heads out of our asses and finally admit that you are so hopelessly in love with each other.”

Roger blinked, his mouth falling open in shock. 

”It took me a while to figure out what was going on between you and it’s so clear. Everything makes sense – the way you’ve been acting… God, if I have to spend yet another day seeing you making those longing glances at each other I’m going to snap.”

Brian was running his fingers through his hair now, letting the frustration flow out of him. Roger took a glance at Freddie who stood beside John completely frozen, holding a mic in his hand.

”This tension is literally driving me nuts and it even shows when we play. Something is just… off,” Brian continued his monologue and John walked over to him, setting his hand on his arm.

”Bri...” the bassist tried but Brian just looked at him, shaking his head.

”This needs to stop right now.” He turned to look back at Roger and Freddie. ”You two won’t be leaving this room until you’ve talked. Properly.”

Freddie still didn’t move, expression completely blank and Roger wasn’t sure if it was just to hide how he was feeling or if he was just so shocked at Brian’s sudden outburst. Then Brian took a hold of John’s hand and basically dragged him out of the rehearsal room, the sound of door closing after them echoing in the midst of silence.

Roger set his drumsticks aside, shifting nervously on his stool and lifting up his hand to rub his neck and shoulder.

”Well, I guess we need to talk,” he said, breaking the silence before it would get too uncomfortable. His words seemed to break Freddie from his trance and the singer finally turned to him, still holding the mic.

”Yeah, though I’m not sure we have much to say,” Freddie stated. ”I mean, Brian pretty much said it already.”

Roger stood up from the stool, slowly walking to Freddie, his heartbeat rising with each step. He stopped in front of the singer, a small, hopeful smile on his lips.

”So it’s true, then? You’re in love with me?” 

The look in Freddie’s eyes softened, honesty leaking through but Roger could also see a flash of fear in it. His heart was hammering in his chest as he waited for Freddie’s answer. Then Freddie took a step closer to him, cupping Roger’s face with his free hand, a fond smile rising to his lips.

”Yes,” Freddie spoke softly and Roger gasped, his heart missing a beat. And then he saw it, for the first time really saw it in Freddie’s eyes.

But then he realized it wasn’t actually the first time. He had seen it before, many times, when they had made those drunken confessions. It had been there all along, right in front of him, clear as a day and he had been so blind.

”So, all those times you said you loved me...” 

”I meant it,” Freddie said, gently stroking Roger’s cheeks. ”I love you so much it hurts sometimes.”

The warmth flooded into Roger’s heart and the tears welled in his eyes as he cupped Freddie’s face. The smile he gave Freddie must have seemed broken but he didn’t care. 

”I love you,” he breathed out. ”I love you so much it nearly killed me to hear you say it because I thought you only meant that you love me as a friend.”

Freddie’s gaze turned to pained and apologetic and he was going to say something but Roger set his forefinger on to his lips, not allowing him to speak.

”And I was ready to take the friendship as it was and just… try to forget my feelings. Having you by my side would have been enough. I could have been happy either way.”

Freddie’s eyes started to glisten and he was clearly trying to hold back tears as he shook his head.

”You really would have settled only for a friendship?” 

”Yes, I would,” Roger answered.

The sound escaping between Freddie’s lips was a bit broken and soon a few tears fell free from his eyes, rolling down his cheeks. Roger wiped them away with his thumbs, his gaze studying Freddie’s beautiful facial features, eventually dropping on to his lips. He leaned in slowly, swiping his tongue over his own lips, wetting them.

”I love you,” Roger said again, eyes going back up and meeting Freddie’s. He leaned even closer, silently asking for permission. A sudden dull sound startled him a bit and Roger realized Freddie had dropped the mic to the floor. The next thing Roger’s brain registered was Freddie’s hands grabbing the front of his shirt and lips crashing against his own. 

The kiss was almost bruising, making Roger’s knees weak, melt into it and he wrapped his arms around Freddie. All the suppressed feelings were flooding into the kiss, happy to be finally freed from the cage they had been in. Freddie slid his other hand to Roger’s hair, fingers threading into the blond strands while their lips danced against one another in demanding rhythm. 

When the air came needed, they broke the kiss, their gazes meeting straight after. They both were panting and needed time to catch their breaths. Freddie’s eyes were now darker shade but the softness hadn’t gone anywhere and Roger felt the familiar, warm veil closing his heart into a sweet embrace. He brought his hand up to caress the side of Freddie’s face, smile returning to his lips. 

Soon their breaths were evening out and Freddie rested his forehead against Roger’s, slowly running his fingers through the blond’s hair. Then Freddie started to laugh, heartily, and it’s like music to Roger’s ears.

”What?” Roger asked quietly.

”We really were fools, weren’t we?”

Roger immediately understood what Freddie meant, humming in agreement.

”Yeah, we were.”

”We really owe Brian a one,” Freddie stated and soon there was a familiar voice replying to it, startling them both.

”And maybe a few more,” Brian said and Freddie and Roger turned to him. The guitarist was standing by the door with a small, teasing smile dancing on his lips. John was standing behind him, arms wrapped around him and resting his chin on Brian’s shoulder.

”How long have you been standing there?” Roger asked, raising his brow.

”We just came in when Freddie was saying that you were fools. You know, we can be quiet.” Brian grinned and Freddie and John stifled a laugh while Roger just rolled his eyes.

”Well, we surely won’t be quiet, right Fred?” Roger teased, winking at Freddie. A light blush crept onto the singer’s cheeks as he grinned. John and Brian were looking at them with wide eyes, but it was clear that they were amused by Roger’s comment.

”Okay, as you two have finally sorted things out maybe we should celebrate it?” Brian suggested and Roger and Freddie shared a meaningful look. Celebration sounded tempting but right now Roger didn’t feel like going out and knew Freddie would agree with him. 

”What if we just stay at home and have a quiet night in? Just the four of us?”

Brian’s gaze turned to John and John gave him a tiny nod, pressing a kiss to his cheek. 

”That sounds nice,” Brian said smiling, turning his attention back to Roger and Freddie and motioning them to come to him and John. ”And I’m so happy you finally came clear with each other. It was pure torture to see you two pining.”

Freddie glanced at Roger, then taking his hand in his and leading him to the other two. John released Brian from the embrace as the guitarist spread his arms to invite Roger and Freddie in a hug. Smiling, they both wrapped their free hand around Brian and Brian’s long arms settled around their shoulders. John joined it by throwing his arms around Brian and Freddie’s waists.

They stayed in a group hug for a while and when they eventually broke it, Roger’s gaze searched for Freddie’s. The joyful sparkle in those brown orbs made his heart flutter happily and he smiled at Freddie. Then Freddie slid his arm around him, pulling him closer and pressing a sweet kiss to his temple, and Roger couldn’t help but beam.

His heart had found peace.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback would make my day. 💖


End file.
